This August finds me in my third month of unemployment this go around, a situation that I am vastly uncomfortable with. And while I am a mother to a very energetic four year old and wonder where I’ve found the time to work in the past while she clings to my hip like a barnacle, I tend to find my idle hands eager for something to do.

For those of you who don’t know me, you’re probably thinking I am a bit crazy. To the ones who do, you already know. Regardless of familiarity, what mid-40’s woman on the cusp of perimenopause isn’t, a little bit crazy? Admit it. You love us. We keep your life interesting.

If you’re in the same decade, your kids are either almost grown or you’re just having them and all of you are wondering what to do with your life. The old mid-life corvette buying younger model days are behind us and have been replaced with every modern, instant gratification pleasure coming out of a smart phone, leaving a person to feel empty. Yearning for something they don’t have. Lamenting on what one thinks could have been.

We can be extraordinary beings when we stop trying to be everyone else and simply be ourselves.

I am not immune to this yearning, especially when I look in the mirror and see more wrinkles more gray hairs, a softer plane on every curve. And I would be lying if I haven’t forgotten or misplaced what I thought my purpose in life is. Our mind is our biggest and often solo adversary.

So here I am. In an effort to appreciate where I’ve been, what I am now, and where I am going, I will put into words the thoughts and memories shackled in my head and maybe, just maybe, one of you will smile. Or laugh. Or cry. Your own core memories unlocked.

Our family is not unique. We are not famous. We try to stay out of the public eye. But our stories have shaped me into a person I could have only imagined being when I was a little girl. And now I get to put the best version of myself forward raising our daughter.

Previous pursuits include: racing drag boats, traveling across country alone, agricultural careers, writing, photography,  guitar dabbling, sand dune riding, and more. I bet I could still cut a light off the starting line. Don’t bet me unless you’re okay losing to a girl. You’d be surprised how many aren’t. 

I’ll share our hunting stories. Maybe a fishing one or two. The dogs. The chickens. The cat even. Want to know about my time as a commissioner for the Arizona Game and Fish Department? It will be here. I’d like to avoid politics but some may slip in here and there. They’re slimy like that.

I’ve got thoughts on conservation, cooking, weeds, what color your front door should really be, the vulnerability of my name attached to these thoughts publicly, the weather and then some.

Oh. And I really like to shoot. Guns, bows and cameras too.

Click follow. Or whatever you’re supposed to do now. Join me. If anything, I’ll cure five minutes of your boredom whether you’re on the toilet or in the doctor’s office.

Why did I title the blog Feed Me. Take Me Hunting? Because at the end of the day, those two sentences sum up this woman’s current Owner’s Manual.

See you next week.